Are any of us really ready for this?

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No one can prepare you for the difficult and/or awkward questions that your children may have about your MS.  I have had the MS diagnosis before I had children so they have grown up with this and not known me any other way but many of you have been diagnosed after and both scenarios have their own sets of challenges. I was still afraid for this day to come and dreaded the tough questions but it already has already happened in my household.

My children have asked

  • “Mommy will you die?”
  • “Mommy will you always have MS?”
  • “How did you get MS Mommy?”
My best advice is to be honest but to keep the facts age appropriate when you are talking to your children.  My children are young so I didn’t want to scare them. I was worried about telling them too much or not saying enough. I just trusted my gut instinct when doing this because no one knows my children better than me right? I did some researching on the internet for some helpful advice so I was prepared beforehand but as best prepared as you try when it comes to children and asking questions expect the unexpected. Are any of us really ready for this?
I just typed this topic into the search engine and pages of websites came up but here are a few example
Top three traps to avoid I would suggest are
  1. Avoid using medical terms they will have no clue what they are and it just confuses them
  2. That MS is NOT contagious and they can not get it by kissing or hugging you
  3. There are researchers all over the world that are searching for a cure everyday
Whenever I have had to explain anything important to my children I try to end whatever conversation we are having with a positive one so that they are not scared or worried when we are done talking. I reassure them that we take our lives one day at a time and enjoy it as best we can. We don’t waste our time or energy worrying about “what ifs” in the future. I sympathize with you if you are going through this right now because when it comes to our babies we want to shelter them from anything scary.
Do those of you who have been in this situation before have any advice for our Moms with MS family? Please feel free to make comments under my blog I would really like to know how others have handled this.
Regards,
Michelle
This entry was posted in Kids, Multiple Sclerosis by Michelle Walsh. Bookmark the permalink.

About Michelle Walsh

Diagnosed in 1991 when she was 18 years old. She flew actively as a Flight Attendant for many years and moved into Inflight Management and worked full time for 14 years until her MS made it unable for her to work anymore. Michelle has also had venoplasty for her CCSVI and most recently had the TVAM and Stem Cell procedures in California. Michelle first became a mom in February 2007 and now has 3 children and is looking forward to sharing more of her stories on her MS journey with us at MomsWithMs.org. Michelle loves to public speak and is a big fan of dark chocolate.

2 thoughts on “Are any of us really ready for this?

  1. Michele this was a great post for me to read and think ahead to. My little one is only 16 months but I know the day will come that I do will have to talk to him about why mommy just isn’t feeling 100% and its not the cold or flu.

    Thanks for sharing your insights and the great links!

    ~michele

  2. Great topic..I keep it very light with my kids and usually just say something about sometimes my body doesn’t work very well, or feels funny. I find they can relate to it. I give pretty simple answers unless they ask for more.

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