Have you heard the saying it takes a village to raise a child. This is so true and if you have a chronic illness then this manifests that concept tenfold I think. It’s frustrating at times when we aren’t sure how we are going to feel from day to day so sometimes we might be a bit reluctant to make plans too far in advance. I find this a challenge when it comes to my children’s fieldtrips at school. When they are all day field trips I do not volunteer for them as they can physically be too much for me. I try to help with any that are shorter or closer to home because my children really want their mom at their field trips sometimes and I don’t want to disappoint them. So in preparation for these days I have to really manage my energy days before in advance to ensure I am not doing too much physically. I kind of think of my energy as a gas tank. Some days you wake up and you only have “half a tank” of energy so you have to prioritize what really needs to be done that day and choose what can wait for another day. I found using this terminology with my kids now helps them to understand better how I am feeling.
When hockey season rolls around like it will be soon I get pretty anxious as it takes a lot out of me to take my son to his practices and games etc. Not to mention a lot of the arenas around here were built many years ago and are not accessible if you have mobility issues. I am so fortunate to have an amazing friend who has a child on the same team and a lot of times last year my son caught rides with them that were away games because the driving just plain wears me out. I truly appreciate her kindness for helping me. Its friends like this I treasure in my heart because they really care and want to help.
I think this is where I carry some guilt when it comes to not being able to do more when it comes to my children’s activities. I try to remind myself that I do what I can when my body allows me to and I need to let that guilt go for the times that I can’t help. I used to take it to heart what others thought or judged me for but not anymore because I truly feel worrying about such non sense is a wasted emotion. I think we can be so hard on ourselves when we are a Mom with MS aren’t we? It’s only human that we want to do more for our children but knowing that we just can’t keep up like some other supermom’s out there and that’s ok. It does not make us any less of a mom.
Be Kind to Yourself
There will always be times when it’s hard to remember your strengths.
These are the times when you need to give yourself special attention.
Be kind to yourself… Kindness nurtures and gives hope to growing dreams.
Respect yourself… Listen to your needs, and treat yourself as you would to a friend.
Encourage yourself… Remember what you truly want, and fight for it as you would for your life.
Appreciate yourself… Don’t take for granted the qualities that make you unique.
Focus yourself… It is with discipline and motivation that you will move towards your goals.
Be giving towards yourself… In that way, your strength will thrive, and you’ll be realizing your goals a day at a time